Wednesday, March 21, 2012

WTF Wednesday - The "Blades of Glory" Edition

A hundred bucks if you can guess where I went yesterday. I know that one person will guess correctly so I'll take the offer back before anyone can speak.

I went ice skating. I know...how very "Motherly" of me.

Don't shut down this blog post until you scroll down to see my triple lutz. 

It's Spring Break, I took a vacation day I went with Ry-guy with a few of his friends and their moms. Sadly, my kid only inherited my "whining gene" and not my "skating gene," (I was quite the shuffler back in the roller-skating days). He very dramatically went out there and took teeny-tiny-baby steps, fell a few times and theatrically faked a few injuries worthy of a traumahawk and an Oscar.

What's he getting at? Sam's mom had let him get one of those ice-skating-helper-bar things. I refused to let Ryan have one. I happen to think these are only appropriate for pre-schoolers.

Evidently "Man Up" isn't a command that children respond to at ice skating rinks very well and $3 later he had his bar. He's paying me back by the way.

Another thing he doesn't have that I do is a pair of gloves. Florida kids don't really need them...until they go ice skating. Note to self for next winter. I let him wear mine.

The other moms didn't want to skate so I tossed my purse and mack-daddy camera (that I still don't know how to use properly) to Sam's mom. She has a real name, it's Gail.

We like Gail. She was amused by my attempts at "figure skating." She even snapped a few blurry pictures for your viewing pleasure.

I was too scared to lift my leg past my knee because I had a 100% no-falling record that I wasn't going to break showing off.

So what's the WTF about this story you ask?

Haven't you noticed that ice skating makes my butt look big? WTF?!?!?





11 comments:

  1. I think you look awesome and I think you might have missed your true calling. And Gail takes some great pictures!

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  2. What? I see no big butt in that pic!

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  3. I have all kinds of new respect for you.

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  4. You are my hero - awesome form. I'm with your son...gimme the granny walker. And thanks for voting!!

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  5. Um, since when do they have ice skating rinks in Florida?

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  6. Are you pushing that kid down in the 3rd picture?

    If so, I like you even more.

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  7. Ummm...I was actually thinking that you had a great butt when I was looking at the pictures.
    My girls always tell me to get in the center to do tricks. They think I am the best ice skater ever. I have them so fooled...they've never once watched ice skating on the TV ;-)

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  8. I fell once the last time I took my daughter. . . I don't remember the ice being so friggin' HARD. Of course, I outweigh the six year old who last fell on the ice by about 150 pounds, and I am falling from about 2 feet higher than he was. . . but MAN. I didn't even really fall that hard. Still hurt.

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  9. Why did i only see this now??? I want to go skating with you! You crack me up!

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